Unexpected....

Unexpected.. When life seems to be at it's best. It seems that something just come and sweep u off the floor. My brother, Yong Han, who most know is in hospital for a disease. This disease is call Systemic Lupus Erthematosus, short for SLE. It is a Chronic autoimmune connective tissue disease. It just means that his antibodies are attacking his cells/ tissue which causes damage.

It just seem like it was a few weeks ago, where me and my brother was playing together on computer. Helping each other in playing. Now, that he is sick and the fact that he has not gotten any proper treatment considering that both specialist ( one in Normah hospital and one in General Hospital ) is away on leave, my brother has to be taken to another place to be treated.

He is going off to Singapore tomorrow to get treatment. Father ( who went off to Germany for a business trip ) is now in Singapore looking for the doctors and sorting out the accommodation and Mother is sorting everything out so that my brother can get to Singapore tomorrow. Both of them are going to leave or is at Singapore currently.

It just feels that everything seems so much pressure around. I just can't bare to think about what might happen if things go wrong. And i have a feeling.. Something will.. In times like this, i wish that i could do something to help. Then again, knowing that, in this kind of situation, i am just going to be a nuisance in all of this just make things worst. At times like these, when u think, why the world is so cruel?

Then the thought just hit you. The world has ever change. It has always been like that. Disease, accidents. It is all just "coincidence" as some might call it. I wish that everything will be gone. Knowing that this disease is not going to go away makes me even more worried. I thought that this kind of thing, like cancer or some other disease would only affect others not my Family. Then again, when my Mom decided to get all 4 of us to go blood test. It is found that all of us have elevated levels of glucose in our blood.

I can only conclude that life is not perfect.. It just seems that when everything is right, when everything seems so perfect, that is when the world just tumble on you. You just can't stand it. Wishing that these things would go away, wishing that sometimes, let other do it. But, it will not go away. Knowing this fact, sucks alot.

Now that, my parents will depend on me alot regarding my brother condition. I feel quite under pressure. More responsibility for me to handle at home. Considering that currently, there is no parents at home, and it could go on for quite a few days scare me quite alot. I don't even think it is safe in my home even throught i have live here since i was born. It feels as if somebody is watching or somebody else is at home.

I can only pray that these disease has not gotten into such a serious stage. If it does, well.. I can't say i didn't foresee it. I just can't imagine what i would do if that happen and i don't want to think that much. Life would be horrible for my brother. That is all i can say. And, i hope, whoever who is reading this, could pray for my brother safety in his treatment, that everything would be all right. That even throught it is an uncurable disease, that he will live a normal life just like anybody.